T-0: pre-op

All checked in. Here goes!

T-1: Eeeek!

I woke up at 06:00 this morning in a panic that today was the day of my surgery and I had missed my 05:30 check-in time!  Unfortunately, this does not bode well for a restful night of sleep tonight!

Obviously I am nervous about tomorrow, so I just used about half of my lunch break to run a couple miles and knock out a quick ab-workout.  Endorphins vs Cortisol aaand...GO!   I have no idea when the next time is that I will be able to go for a run.  I know that I am restricted to lifting < 24lbs for 4-5weeks so not sure how that will translate to ground reaction/impact forces...  Regardless, I'm sure I will have some major re-conditioning work ahead of me once I'm cleared!

Also I ate just about EVERYTHING yesterday.  My friends & family brought the most food I think I have seen anywhere!  I feasted until I was sick and then ate some more!  I really ought to step on a scale before surgery tomorrow just to have a baseline #.  I think I've succeeded on putting on between 5-7 lbs since early December which should make the 10% body weight loss less obvious :)

T-2: Party Time!

Today is going to be an awesome day!

Last night before bed my phone white-screened, As I was falling asleep I was trying to plot out a time to make it to the AT&T store, but this morning I plugged it into my computer and it turned on. HUZZAH! (I'm backing it up right now!)

Today is also going to be an awesome day because today, I am hosting a food binge party!  My dear friends are coming over and bringing the one food/dish that they would miss the most if they could not eat solid foods. So its a funny twist on a potluck, but this way I  have no food regrets and even more importantly I get to party with my friends.  ( I think it might be awhile after this!) I'm so excited to see everyone!

(update)
How can a girl possible be upset about what's ahead when she has awesome friends like this right now? :)

T-3: Getting all Pretty

3 days, oh boy!

I can't describe the mix of emotions I am feeling except to say just about every definition of anxiety covers it.  I am anxious to get this over with and move on with my life.  I am nervous about the recovery and the difficulties I will have over the next 6 months.  I am frustrated at the lack of control I will have in the next 2 weeks. I am excited to have an improved jaw/mouth and leave much of my chronic pain nothing but a distant memory.  I am exhausted, as the worrying is actually waking me up in the middle of the night and doesn't let me go back to sleep. Finally I am still hopeful that many of the blogs I have read exaggerated the difficulty of recovery and I will skate through this like its nothing.

But tonight, I get an amazing date night with my fabulous husband.  We received (incredible!) tickets to a musical for tonight as a Christmas present. So I am getting all dressed up and feeling as pretty as possible, for what will probably be the last time in awhile... and I am hoping that my husband can hold on to that image when he's taking care of the drooling, sloppy mess I'm about to become.

T-5: Hooks!

I feel like I need to start with a quote from Captain Hook, but I couldn't find the perfect one, so on to my status update...

I started my morning headed to the hospital (it was an eerie foreshadow of next week).  Where I submitted several vials of blood for testing to clear me for anesthesia and I guess to gain final clearance for surgery... hope my blood tests well!    

Then it was straight to the orthodontist. Dr. R and his amazing technician Hope were awesome as usual.  They both did their best to put me at ease and reassure me that it was not really going to be as bad as all that.  Well, at least they were honest and told me that it wasn't going to be a fun experience, but that it was something that I was not going to regret.  Dr. R told me that he has never had anyone come back from this surgery (with my surgeon) and regret the results.  He did say that some people have even told him it wasn't as bad as having their wisdom teeth pulled. (yea right!)
They then added the surgical hooks on to my wires for the rubber bands.. Why you ask, did they add more metal onto my teeth to jab into my cheeks and cut up the inside of my mouth just days before my surgery?  Well as the surgeon will not actually hardwire me shut after the operation, these are used instead to put lots of rubber bands on all these tiny hooks and keep me from opening my mouth too wide and screwing up all the surgeon's hard work.


Up close picture of my teeth, you can see the hooks.
They are the extra bit of metal posts between each of the teeth.

And that is hopefully it for the pre-op doctor visits!  My remaining plan is to continue eating as much as I feel like for the next few days. I do feel a smidge guilty about this with my work colleagues on their New Years Resolution diets eating itty bitty salads for lunch while I scarf pizza in front of them...whoops!

T-6 : Pre-Op Surgeon Visit

So Tom & I met with my surgeon today. I forgot just how laid back he was about everything!  He's been doing maxillofacial surgery for about 35 years and he pretty much told me that this was a "routine"  surgery. (ha!) But he definitely calmed me down on some of my worries. 

I have probably read about 15 blogs from other people who have had double jaw surgery so I had a big list of questions and concerns from some of their rough patches with their surgeries & recoveries. And to many things that were so urgent and awful to [other people in] their blogs, my surgeon said "no problem." Some of them were...

• "So I can't drink out of straw?" - Sure you can.
• "So I can't blow my nose?" - Sure you can, just keep your mouth open when you blow your nose, sneeze or cough.
• "How swollen will I get?'  - I'll be able to tell you after the surgery, but it will increase after your leave the hospital. 
• "When will I be able to talk." -As soon as you wake up after surgery.
• "When will I be able to run again?" -As soon as you can tolerate it.
• "Will I have one of those awful splints wired into my mouth?" - Yes, but it isn't that invasive.  (I'm not sure about this one though, a lot of other people who had this surgery said this was the worst part and their best day when it came out.)

He also gave me a super fun looking book called Dinner Through a Straw; A Handbook for Maxillary Trauma.  I'll let you know if there are any good highlights! 

 

And then one of my biggest worries about this appointment...he then showed me a computer rendition of what my facial profile will/might look like after the swelling goes down.  And I have to say it  was AWFUL! It made me look like a Bulldog. (which as Tom gleefully pointed out is technically my high school mascot, making me already a bulldog...it was a well timed joke and cut off my anxiety).  So I'm choosing to pretend that I never saw that terrible picture and we'll just see what comes out at the end of all of this!

Tomorrow I get my pre-op labs done for the hospital and then go to the orthodontist for the last time before surgery to get my surgical hooks applied to my braces...more wires! It feels like its all happening so fast all of a sudden!

T-7 Days

This morning I woke up with pain in my left jaw from stress clenching my teeth all night.  I am definitely getting nervous about this operation.  (Actually I am not all that nervous about the operation itself, I'll be happily sedated for that portion!) I'm really getting worried about the recovery process and how rough the next 6 months- 1 year will be for my mouth/face/life.

I will meet with the surgeon for my pre-op appointment tomorrow.  Tom will be coming with me so that he can get all my post-op instructions and details on how he can/ will need to take care of me.  I truly have the best, most supportive husband, but it is downright terrifying to me to think that I will be completely dependent on others for 1-2 weeks.

Tomorrow the surgeon will go into detail of exactly how many times and in how many places will be breaking my jaw and realigning it to correct all its imbalances.  I have a good idea of what to expect, but I will find out in gross detail just how extensive this will be.  Also he promised me a computer simulation of what my face will look like post-surgery.  I have to admit this is pretty intimidating!  I try not to be vain, but its so weird to think that the face that has stared back at me in the mirror for 32 years will be different. I'm trying to believe that I'll still look largely like me, this isn't after all a cosmetic surgery, and the doc did promise to make everything look as aesthetically pleasing as possible. However it is a huge unknown and I'm a little nervous to see that image on the screen. 

So to sum it up, I have a empty pit in the middle of my stomach, when I think about tomorrow's appointment.... Wish me luck!



I'm still not very good with the selfies, but in case I forget later here are a couple "before" pics. 1/6/2015